It's Not Easy!

Woke up this morning thinking about my friends. I am so blessed that God put them in my life. We went to the Science museum yesterday with our friends. The kids were so happy. My daughter loves to get out in the fresh air with her friends and just sing. While we were there the other mom and I began talking, as most of us socially deprived mothers do. And as usual we were talking about our kiddos. I came to a realization yesterday that a lot of us homeschool moms are in the same boat when it comes to teaching our kids. Yesterday, we woke up early. I had plans of a relaxed day. In my mind the kids would do their written work quickly and we would have the rest of the day to play. Well, that was living in a fantasy world. The minute the children picked up a pencil the whining began. I would explain what would need to be done, leave them to do it, and then be called back 2 seconds later for 'help'. It went on like this all morning with quite a bit of tears shed. As a mother you start to think that your doing something wrong. You start to think that it is your fault they are crying-that it is your fault that it is not easy. You began to think that your a bad teacher- that your a bad mother. And then you question homeschooling all together. "Am I doing the right thing?" you repeat to yourself over and over again. We came home from our science museum trip and I talked to another mom I know on the phone last night. She was having some of the same issues. Not only was she questioning, but she was angry. I know that feeling too. You get angry at your kids. You get angry at yourself. You get angry at the kitchen sink! And then... you feel guilty because your angry. On and on it can circle. I know. I've been there. Done that. And still do it. Until I realize one thing. One word. Satan. Now immediatley in my head I hear, 'Now don't go blaming Satan for everything'. That is Satan saying that!!! He wants us to think it is our fault. He wants us to think we are not good mothers, teachers, wives. He tells over and over again that we are not good enough. Here is the thing: Life is HARD. That is not our fault. Ok ,maybe in a round about sort of way. Yes, Adam ate the apple and Eve was seduced by it. Sin entered the world. Yes, yes yes, it is man's (and woman's) fault. But it is not our individual fault that life is hard. It Just Is. Sin Is In This World. Now what is our fault is how we deal with it. Do we beleive Satan? Do we believe those lies in our head-those feelings of guilt? Your guilty if you do. Your guilty if you don't, according to this world. It does not matter what you do. The world already calls you guilty. Here is the kicker: Knowing that information, knowing that life is hard, knowing that it is not our individual fault and that sin is on this Earth, we can make some choices. Deal with it! How? First and always -Pray. That is something I forget to do in the midst of trouble. Yes, I pray in the morning and I pray at night. But I need to remember to pray while trouble is happening. The minute those thoughts start to enter our mind we need to pray. PRAY, PRAY, PRAY!! And then take a deep breath, take your emotions out of it, and deal with it. Do not add to the whining and crying. Let them whine, let them cry. It's ok. But they still have to do their work. We do not have to argue with our kids about doing their work. We have to stay the path without getting our emotions into it. Do not argue back! We are the parents. We don't have to convince them of our way. From so many moms I hear these words: "But so and so doesn't like this or that.... " There are many things my kids don't like. Oh well! If I think it is something that is good for them, they are going to do it. Period. No argument, no having to convince. Period. It is very freeing as a parent when you realize that you do not have to get your emotions into it. These are God's children that we are raising, not only our own. We have responsibilities to God to do the right things for our children. The right thing is not always what our kids want. Does God yell and and scream at us? I have never heard Him yelling. Sometimes He talks very loudly. But screaming? No. We don't have to yell. We don't have to scream. We don't have threaten. We don't have to bribe. We just have to expect that it will be done. And if it is not... then there needs to be consequences. These consequences need to be laid out. You don't do your homework. You don't get lunch. You don't clean your room. You don't go out to play. (Even if mommy really wants to go out to play.) You hit your sister or brother. Go to your room and you get spanked. We don't have to get mad. We don't have to try to avoid punishing our children. We just have to follow through. Sounds so easy? It is. When you realize that you have to stop trying to make it easy.